Triple Date

Day 32. Friday. November 1.

Stayed at home and laver hygge and watched After Earth while eating McDonald’s for dinner with my host dad and the kids. It was really a good movie. My host mom wasn’t home for it because she had an appointment. Pagkatapos nag Customer Service Representative kay Elyonna. Hahaha!!!

Day 33. Saturday. November 2.

Went to Lovsang 2013 at the Rådhus. Had a blessed time there. Then went to Tita Mina’s little pa-birthday celeb. Then went out again with Tricia. Details later. Haha. On another post.

Day 34. Sunday. November 3.

Had a wonderful morning service at church and an enlightening fellowship afterwards with my lovely ladies: Cynthia, Eva, Elyonna, Jeza, Krislee, Lotis, and Noemie. Attended the Venue with them and Gypsy, Irene, Ivy, and Janeth. Felt energized. Had a small talk and laver hygge med dem og Monika, Rebecca, and Silvia. Awesome Sunday. Got home a little wet though. Nagbike sa ulan eh.

Wednesday’s Calm, Lucky Nine

Day Nine.

I had a calm and relaxing Wednesday. After doing my responsibilities in the morning, I was able to sit down and enjoy lunch and have a little nap afterwards. I wasn’t planning to sleep, but, I was laying down while reading a pocketbook and after a while I dozed off and slumbered to Lalalandia. But, I got to finish the book, too. When I woke up, I still had time to spare before working again, so I used it to read again. It has been a year, I think, since I last read a PHR novel. Gosh, how I missed those days that I get to read more than three PHR novels in a day. So, it was really refreshing to be able to finish one today. I miss collecting pocketbooks, too. Oh well, it has to wait. I’d probably buy a lot of books when I go back to the PH. It’s cheaper there.

Then, today, I received my first eBay purchase. So, glad to finally have it. It took 18 days for it to arrive. But, that’s fine considering the distance it has to travel. So, I’m waiting for the other stuff to arrive. I have two eBay purchases. The second one actually arrived first. Geez. It sounds like I made it confusing. Hahaha. But, yeah, I am a happy girl with my happy top.

I cooked dinner, too. I made Chicken with Sweet and Sour Sauce. I really thought though that I won’t be doing any cooking this week because I’m supposed to cook Tuesday and Thursday. But, anyway, we have to do our part, our share. So, it’s cool. And thinking or reading or writing about food makes me hungry. I’m hungry. Gotta check the kitchen after writing this.

I also got a copy of House of Hades. Been waiting for this for a long time. It’s really awesome to have reliable friends.

I thought of watching the first episode of Kore wa Zombie Desu Ka. In one scene, it showed the lead character seated by the window. I remembered reading a meme, I think, about how almost always all the lead characters in a story are seated beside the window. I realized, yeah, they should be seated near the window so they can easily see if there are any commotions outside that needs their attention and see if there’s a need for them to sneak out from class. Or just be pulled out from the window. 😀

Okay, generally, I had a calm and relaxing Wednesday, but, Charlie – the dog, never fails to give me adrenaline rush and irritation at the same time. We were almost home when our neighbor brought out their dog and we had to meet them. I think Charlie and Aiko are friends, but in a doggy way, so it drives me crazy when they want to greet each other ’cause they have to lunge at each other. Pisses me off big time. Totally gets under my skin. But, then, I had to think about the rest of the day and it was fine. So, all is well.

Testy Tuesday

Day Eight.

I was still a bit anxious when I woke up. But, everything went well in the morning. But, in the afternoon, well, around 5PM maybe, things became difficult. My patience was really tested. I had to summon all the patience I can get. I’m just glad there is someone that reminds me that I can make it through. Na kaya ko ito. I’m doing my best to let my otaku spirit out. It is after all my “never give up” spirit. But, things could sometimes really get into your nerves and piss you off big time. Like today.

I had to walk the dog. I’ve been doing it since… I couldn’t even remember. Must have been a long time already. But, since the incident last September 28, I’ve been paranoid when walking the dog. So, earlier, he saw a hare. He wanted to run off after it. I really had to stand my ground, but with bended knees spread apart for better balance, to stop him from doing so. I don’t wanna hurt him. But, I really had to pull his leash so he won’t run away. It’ll be another worry for me if he runs away. Di pu-pwede ‘yon. So, I really had to shout, too, and with instinct, I had a flurry of swear words coming out from my mouth. And I’ve been trying to stop from saying bad words. But, he just brings out the worst in me. So, while fuming in anger, I thought that feeling stressed out and irritated every time I walk him will do me no good. It totally affects my health. Makes me worry about my cardiovascular system… and mental health. It’s no fun to play tug-of-war with a dog almost your size but double your strength. It just isn’t.

I thought that was the end of my lemons for today. Until, I spoke with a friend. She, too, can bring out the hideous monster in me. I had to get away to get a breath of fresh air or I’d go to sleep with a bad day. So, I stopped chatting with her and concentrated on chatting with those that actually made me feel better. Not that I don’t like talking to her. But, I just can’t handle how our conversation today is sucking the life out of me.

On a positive note, all the manga/anime that I keep myself updated were up to par. Didn’t bring me down. Inspired me. Regaled me. Entertained me. I also had, what seemed to become a weekly routine, a healthy discussion with LA about Bleach’s latest chapter. It’s really awesome when after reading or watching something you can discuss your points of view with someone who can relate to what you just have read or watched. All is well.

Melancholic Monday

Seventh Day.

I woke up feeling anxious. Parang ayaw ko na ngang gumising kanina eh. I had one of those days. Evaluation days. I just can’t help myself from feeling na de numero ang galaw ko. Yung tipo bagang konting palpak lang eh pwede ng gawing malaki. Ang hirap gumalaw kapag de numero ang bawat kilos mo. Feel ko nga magkakasakit ako sa puso dahil sa kabang nararamdaman ko. Naiiyak ako dahil di ko alam kung ano ba ang dapat kong gawin para di ko maramdaman ang kaba sa dibdib ko. Parang gusto ko nang isigaw kanina ang “Ayawan na!”

Sabi nga ng mga kaibigan ko, chillax lang daw and do the best I can. Don’t be so hard on myself. Kaso, di ko mapigilan ang sarili ko na masyadong advanced mag-isip. And, I guess, until all goes well, I would be stuck feeling anxious. And it’s not good for my health. Mental and otherwise. Being in constant watch, tension and stress with work isn’t good. Being uncomfortable with what you do is destructive. But, I told myself, challenge accepted! So, as long as they want me here, I’m staying. And I’m giving my bestest ever even though at times it seems like my bestest (if there is ever a word) isn’t good enough. However, if this has to end, then so be it.

This is the fourth lemon I had in just two months. It could overwhelm a person when you have to go through, I would say, four major disappointments in life in just a short amount of time. It wouldn’t be easy. But, I remembered what Pastor Leif said last night. God didn’t promise that things will be easy, but He promised that He will be with us all the time. So, it reminded me that I maybe I was right in believing that there is something great in store for me that’s why I had to undergo these setbacks. But, I just hope that I know how to identify that something God planned for me. I just hope that I would be given clarity, enlightenment so I would know what to do and how to act on it. I guess this is where the Holy Spirit comes in. Gotta keep the faith and hang on.

Hasta La Vista, Gerletz

Fifth Day.

We held Connie’s farewell party. I got here at her place around 2PM to help her out with the preparation. The party started at 6PM. I didn’t bring her a gift yet. Partly because I wasn’t able to buy yet what I wanted to give her; but, mostly because I wanted to give it to her on or before the day she leaves. I have a lot to tell her, but I haven’t written it yet. It’s like if I actually do it, it’s like really saying “bye-bye na”. She still have 2 weeks left here, until then, no emo moments muna.

Connie, she’s the bestest friend I got here in Denmark. It’s her that I could always lean on when I need a friend. She’s almost always the one I hang out with. She’s the model I got when I feel like being a photographer and I needed a human subject. She’s my ka-foodtrip. It’s just unfair that she doesn’t get fat even if we eat a lot. 🍲🍰🍮🍹😠Hahaha!!! She’s my kalakwatsa sa gabi. Not going to bars, though. Basta pag may event at gagabihin, siya ang nakakasama ko. Siya din ang partner ko sa kantahan. 🎤🎼🎵🎶 We’ve recorded songs we covered. Kahit na may bloopers. And maybe because we hang out a lot together, minsan sabi ng iba, magkamukha na daw kami. Some have mistaken us as siblings. And someone thought we’re twins. The sibling thing is passable. I tell her, we could be sisters as long as I’m the bunso. But the twin thing, that is just so questionable. Height pa lang, 7 inches na siguro ang difference. She’s almost skinny. I’m stuffy. We don’t really look like twins.👭

She’s not perfect. She gets into my nerves, pisses me off and drives me crazy. We argue. We fight. But, at the end of the day, her beautiful personality surpasses her imperfection.

I’ll miss you gerletz. But, it’s not goodbye, it’s see you again. Ses vi ikke gøres? 👋

Just My Luck

This is my second post for my “diary”. I skipped the second day, which was yesterday. Can you see my dedication? Gawd. I’m horrible. And I won’t make excuses about it. But, yeah, I’ll try to keep one anyway.

Third day.

I guess di lang talaga ako paboritong anak ni Lady Luck. Kasi naman nung nagbahagi ng swerte ang Diyos, hinayaan lang niya akong matulog sa pansitan. Ayan tuloy, just my luck na lang talaga, wala na ngang kwenta lovelife ko, bokya pa career ko. Ehrmergerd. Kill yourself ui.

On second thought, dahil nga sa klase ng swerte na meron ako, malamang di rin magiging successful ang pagpapatiwakal. Baka kailanganin ko pa ng hired assassin. Gosh! Mamamatay na nga lang, expensive pa din. Kalurkey! Ikaw na!

It seems like this year and the last quarter of last year, I am in a perpetual state of depression and a little joy. I wasn’t even manic nor euphoric. It’s just after depression, sasaya lang ng konti. Just when I thought everything is going out fine, things start to turn out bad. It’s just crazy. Isang pirma na lang siguro ng dysfunctional neurons ko, baliw na ako.

Pero, iisipin ko na lang na “this, too, shall pass”. Otaku spirit activate with fist held high!

Lord, flattered naman po ako na ang laki ng tiwala nyo na kaya kong lampasin ang lahat ng pagsubok na hinarap ko… Pang apat na itong panibago sa loob lang ng dalawang buwan. I am grateful Lord sa tiwala Niyo, pero, pwede pong break din muna? Nauubos din po ang powers at energy ko. Need ko din po ang magrecharge at magchillax. Need ko po ang mag-ipon ng positive vibes, panglaban sa stress, pampatatag loob. Sige na po, Lord, please? Maawa naman po sa puso ko, magkakasakit ako sa puso ng wala sa oras eh. Okay po ba, Lord? Salamuch po. Amen.

Dear Diary

Nang minsang magmuni-muni ako, naisip kong pwede nga akong magblog everyday. Di naman kailangan na mahaba ang isusulat. I thought of making my blog a sort of a daily diary. I even thought it funny that I would start it at the last quarter of the year. Kamuntik na namang di matuloy, i was on the verge of falling in to “bukas na lang“. But I got a grip of myself. Told myself that if I don’t do it now, I might not ever. Baka mauwi ako lagi sa “bukas na lang”. Bad idea.

So, ayun, I had a long day. I started 6.45AM, I ended around 9.30 or 10PM maybe. I had to manage the house, do the dishes, do the laundry, train Victor and assist him with biking, and walk Charlie. Charlie is the most difficult of all. Since the incident last Friday, kung saan nasugatan ang kamay ko, I am acting really paranoid when walking Charlie. Lingon ng lingon and really pushing my pandinig to hear even the slightest movement around. I had to be alert in sensing other dog in the vicinity. I am so wary of having other dogs around when walking him. No, I am actually wary of anything that could get his interest and make him run after it. It’s not easy to walk a dog almost my size… or maybe heavier than me. It drives me crazy when Charlie runs after something. I think the next time he does, I might get a cardiac arrest even though I have no problem with my cardiovascular system.

Ayun, inaantok na talaga ako. I’ll just post another entry tomorrow. 🙂